I can't believe it but my little bugaboo is 3 weeks old today!! Where has the time gone?! I was telling my mom the other day that I'm finally feeling like, "Ah, I can do this. I am confident in my ability to care for Collin and hopefully be a good mommy to him. And we're finally getting on a routine. No more day and night confusion!" There was a time when I didn't think I'd ever get to this point, but I'm here! And it only took 3 weeks. I'm thinking that's not too bad.
We had a rough week last week, though, because when I took him in for his 2 week appointment, he hadn't regained enough weight to put him back at his birth weight. I, of course, had been worrying about him and wondering if he was getting enough milk from me as I was breastfeeding him. I even called my OBG/YN a couple days before his 2 week appointment asking how to get my milk supply up. Well, my worst fears were confirmed when we found out he wasn't gaining weight like he should be. Boy, did I feel like the worst mom ever!! I truly didn't mean to starve the little guy (and no, he wasn't starving but trying to convince me that I hadn't hurt my little man was nearly impossible). The doctor reassured me that with a little supplementing he'd be back at his birth weight in no time. So, that's what we did. I breastfeed and supplemented him with formula. I also began taking some medication to get my milk supply up. Unfortunately, I don't believe it's helping me make more milk or perhaps my milk isn't rich enough for him...if that's even possible. But, the good news is that Collin is putting on weight...and quickly!! PRAISE THE LORD!! And that's what I've been most concerned about. So, I believe I've come to the conclusion that for whatever reason, breastfeeding isn't going to work out. Oh how this breaks my heart because I LOVE breastfeeding and if I could only make more it would be great. But my top priority is to care for my sweet little man....and putting weight on and growing as he should is what's most important. So, any reassurances that I'm still a good mom even though breastfeeding isn't going to work are much appreciated! :)
More importantly, here are some pictures of the little guy!! Oh he just gets sweeter every day!!